Today was Halloween. May was a dog, and Ben was a frog. Jill took the kids to downtown Collingswood for trick-or-treating which was too busy and crowded. I took the kids down the block for trick-or-treating.

May and I had a fight about who would carry the pumpkin bucket that we filled with candy. May wanted to carry it, so that she could stop, unwrap some candy, and then eat it. This really slowed us down, particularly because May is not good at unwrapping candy. We had a fight, and I won. She said, "Dad, you're a monster!" Naturally, after dinner we gorged on chocolates and we got along a lot better after that.

We ate so much candy that I was too sick to do yoga.

I've very tired today. Ben had another eye surgery earlier in the week and between that and Halloween, I've had to stay up late to keep up on things. Right now, as I type, I'm reviewing the recording of a lecture I missed, reviewing some notes I made on this, and blogging.

The lecture I'm reviewing is talking about the cryptosporidium outbreak in Milwaukee back in '93.

On Saturday, Jill and the kids went to the apple farm while I stayed at home and studied. The got some delicious apples, and some pumpkins, and some other things - particularly apple cider donuts. May got to eat an apple cider donut for breakfast yesterday. I talked with her yesterday morning about it.

"What did you have for breakfast today, May?"

"Oatmeal squares," she said. She likes this kind of cereal.

I said, "Did you have anything else?"

Her eyes light up, "Apple-Cider-Donut!"

"And how was that?" I asked.

"It was awesome!" she replied with absolutely no self consciousness.

Today at dinner, Benjamin was pretty wild and pretty hungry. When he saw me cooking the chicken, he would point at the pan and scream. Usually we figure out what he wants and give it to him, but he had to wait. Jill was able to get him to watch a little bit of Elmo, but Ben is not yet "good" at watching TV. In other words, TV doesn't grab hold of his mind and crush his desire to do things, as it does with so many of the rest of us. Watching TV with Ben is highly interactive and to keep him interested you have to give a constant play by play of what Elmo is doing in the show.

We sat down for dinner and Ben immediately grabbed all the chicken on his plate, crammed it in his mouth, and swallowed. Then he began to bang his plate on the table until more meat was put on his plate and he could cram it down his gullet. He also ate a few noodles.

Earlier today, Ben and Jill walked by the neighbor's house and Ben said (or so I am told) the neighbor girl's name clear as a bell, "Parsley." (That's not her real name, but I'm trying to be more sensitive about protecting other people's identity in my blog.)

Dr. Buesher, the professor who runs our bacteriology lab, had a bad day in the lab today. A lot of people kept screwing up the simple diagnostic tests we had to run to determine the various strains of bacteria we were assigned. He kept swearing up and down that we all had the same samples, then he would catch people doing the tests wrong and explain, patiently and professionally, how to do the tests correctly. We got out of the lab on time, but just barely. I think Dr. Buescher likes to see us all get out of lab early.

I have an exam on Friday.

I've been interested in creating polls in Facebook lately, go ahead and fill this one out.

Tonight for bed, May wanted to read her 'Jimmy Neutron' book. She said, "I really like this Jimmy Neutron show. It's on Nickelodeon."

I asked her, "What do you like about Jimmy Neutron?"

"I don't know," she replied honestly.

Benjamin took some very poor naps this afternoon. He slept for about 30 minutes this afternoon and insisted on no morning nap. This is not enough sleep for a 16 month old baby to be getting. Jill told me this morning that he spends all day either getting into trouble and making mischief, or having painful accidents falling down, tripping, or leaping off of things he shouldn't. I did manage to see him playing in the sandbox this afternoon without being naughty or getting hurt. He spent about 10 minutes trying to shovel sand into a bucket.

When I got home from dinner, I noticed that Jill was in the process of forgetting about and throughly burning the beans I had asked her to boil briefly this afternoon. I think her plan was to burn the beans and then force me to eat chicken. I foiled her scheme by opening a can of beans and beginning the meal from scratch again. My only regret: canned beans, though still inexpensive, are slightly more expensive that dried beans.

We visited my grandma last weekend and really enjoyed ourselves. It was very relaxing and the kids were very well behaved. They got to spend most of Sunday playing with my cousin's son, Ariel, and they loved it. Grandma was in good spirits, and my aunt and uncle were able to visit for lunch before running back to the office to work on Sunday. We drove back late Sunday and I studied until midnight. I've been feeling a little behind all week.

I'm pround to announce that my tofu polunga recipe won second place in the vegetarian category of the American Medical Students Association recipe contest. To check it out, or perhaps try the recipe yourself, see http://www.amsa.org/tnp/2007RecipeContest.pdf - I always thought it was a good recipe and am proud to see the medical students around the country agree.

Earlier this week, I had more of a mixed bag of culinary achievements. I went to the an Iftar celebration of the muslim student union on campus to support muslim students. Jill normally disallows any sort of evening activity, but because I had to volunteer the same night in Philadelphia, and because Jill is a strong believer in promoting religious and cultural tolerance, I was allowed to go the Iftar breaking of the fast. Unfortunately, many other students arrived before me and, though not many people had been fasting, many feasted on the the food for the fasting before I arrived. I got some pita bread and some hummus, which was really good. My friend, Katina, was so upset that the food was gone that she invited me to come to an AMWA (women in medicine group) lunch the next day. I agreed and then went to get a slice of pizza with Alithea and Curtis to fill up. We went to NYPD Pizza, which has very good pizza, and I got a slice of 'Brooklyn style' which had too much stuff on it. Next time, I'll just get the cheese.

Anyway, we went to the back of the pizza parlor and sat down to eat. The back door of the pizza parlor was open, and an enormous pitbull was restrained behind a flimsy tension gate. This dog's head was about as big around as my chest. The owner and some workers were teasing the dog, by pretending to beat up a kid (presumably the dog's owner or friend). I was trying to eat my slice while Cujo thundered and rattled against the toothpick gate. Finally, the owner must have felt sorry for us and put the dog away.

Before I talk about the next two free lunch events I attended, I should say that there are a plethora of free food giveaways (usually cheap pizza) to convince you to come and hear someone talk about medicine or to try and convince you to volunteer. Many of the clubs on campus that give the free lunches have 'leadership positions' open in which you work with a team of bright, overachieving students to organize the delivery and consumption of the free pizza. I am the secretary of the emergency medicine club, which means I print and distribute fliers about free pizza lunches.

The next day I went to the organizing meeting for the Women in Medicine group. They had wonderful Malaysian food from the Banana Leaf restaurant. The Pad Thai was possibly the best I've ever had. The women were a little suspicious of me, as I was the only man at the meeting, but I had two cover lines that I used to blend in with the crowd.

1. Actually, many of the issues that we talk about as 'women's issues' are really 'family issues.' When there are discussions about work/life balance, only women attend, but work/life balance affects everyone in the family, dad included. Affordable childcare, also sometimes called a woman's issue is really a family issue as well.
2. I support women in medicine (just as I support muslims on campus) and women in general. Women can do anything they want to, often women like to tell me what to do, and I do it. I like working with women and talking with women. I like the way women smell. Men usually don't smell as good and are not as sensitive. Additionally, women can have babies, are smarter than men, and wear a bra.
   

Wednesday was my last free lunch event of the week. I went to a talk on the latino community in Philadelphia (75% peurto rican, BTW) and public health concerns. I had a pickle, half a turkey sandwich, and half a roast beef sandwich. Then I went to a meeting where two faculty members and a small group of other students watched my terrible standardized patient interview. I showed them the best part of the interview and they thought I was pretty good.

News of the kids.

Yesterday, Ben, May, and Jill did their toenails. Benjamin loves to get his nails painted with the girls and practices on his own with toy makeups and real makeups. He also does his own chapstick and can put the cap back on the chapstick by himself.

May and Jill had a fight about what shoes Jill was going to wear the other day. May didn't like the shoes Jill was going to wear and got very upset because they were 'too old.' They went back and forth about the shoes until May earned herself a timeout. Jill got to wear her old shoes.

Yesterday was a really hard day for us. I had to stay in Philly until 10:30 PM, so Jill had to do dinner and bedtime with the May and El Destructo by herself. Whenever I miss the witching hours with the kids, I try to get Jill a chance to get out of the house by herself and do something she enjoys, for example, walking around the town and listening to MP3s of NPR.

Yesterday morning, I was watching the kids while Jill went for a walk. While I was using the toilet, Ben (aka El Destructo) tried to go down the stairs holding the railing and fell. He got a tremendous goose egg (worse than his fall in his grandparents RV) on his forehead. Later that day, El Destructo was struggling with his sister over the position of the cabinet doors of the television armoire. El Destructo lost that battle in a very dramatic manner when his sister smashed the armoire door into his head to give him a matching goose-egg on the other side of his forehead.

El Destructo knows a new word now. He can say, "Out-side." Or if that's not clear enough for you, he points at the door and says "OUT! OUT!" when he wants to go outside to play.

May is really into The Jungle Book lately. She found a stuffed teddy bear that she's called Baloo and a stuffed jaguar that she calls Bagheera. Bagheera and Baloo live a perilous existence at our house and are constantly plagued by diarrheal viruses, tonsilar problems, and scraped elbows. In between these dramatic problems, they have the more mundane trips to the potty and bedtime rituals.

My friend Mike visited this weekend. It was great to see him. We went to a bar and ate chicken wings and watched some of the Phillies game 3 loss to the Rockies. I was really glad to see him, but after he left I felt very sad and lonely.

This afternoon I got the score back on my immunology and virology exam and was pleased with my performance.

When I got home, Jill was very determined to bury some rocks in the back yard. She took apart a small pile of broken asphalt, and for each piece, dug a hole with an edging spade. After burying each piece of broken asphalt, she raked the dirt over the burial ground, and explained her plan to rearrange the kids' outside toys. She seemed pleased with the burial.

This week was a tough week for everyone. I had an exam on Friday and was very busy studying. The kids were very sick, and Jill scratched her cornea.

Early in the week Ben was still taking an anti-biotic for his ear infection, then he started getting the runs. We assumed it was from the anti-biotic, but read on dear reader, read on. After taking his anti-biotic for about four days, he broke out in hives. I was worried that he had developed an allergy to the anti-biotic. The doctor seemed to think that Ben was allergic to shrimp, which we had with some pasta 24 hours earlier. Ben didn't eat any shrimp, but Jill did, and she's still nursing him.

Then, May started coming down with something, we thought it was a sinus infection, and so did the doctor. The next day, however, May started throwing up and having diarrhea. We took her off the anti-biotic and she had the runs for a few more days before she broke out in hives. It took her a day or two to recover her strength, and she'll be going back to school at the next available opportunity.

Jill and I both came up with a diagnosis of rotavirus.

Anyway, on Wednesday Jill scratched her eye, so I cut my study afternoon short and came home to help her figure out how to get herself to the doctor. I looked in her eye and couldn't find anything and then we decided that she had to go see her doctor or go to the ER. Her doctor was out, so a neighbor drove her to the ER down the street.

After that, I drove Jill and the kids around to get some medicine and Jill called a bunch of people and talked about what was happening. She would call them and say, "I know that everything is going to be OK, yeah, I'm trying to take it easy." Then she would get off the phone and cry for a while before calling someone else she could be brave with.

So, there are not a lot of dentists that take our health insurance. We managed to find one dentist in a nearby, rundown neighborhood, called Camden. Camden is a predominantly African American neighborhood with few economic and real estate opportunities. Consequently, people call it a "bad" neighborhood, or, my favorite epithet, "America's most dangerous city." While it's true that a few bystanders were victims of a crossfire in a shooting a few weeks ago, it seems there is a chance of being shot anywhere in the Philadelphia area: a crazy nut opened fire on a bus driver and his passengers last week.

Our new dentist is a fascinating man. He's in the army reserve and has a masters degree in public health. I wasn't aware that dentists ever got MPH degrees as dental schools don't put much emphasis on social justice or public service. Our dentist, who could open an office anywhere, is obviously a guy who is trying to do his part to improve Camden. I think his practice is just starting as he sometimes has to answer the phone himself.

Anyway, Jill took May to the dentist in Camden last week. May is always used to being cute and getting whatever she wants. She threw a toy and hit an older African American woman in the hair. Jill asked her not to do that, but May persisted with various antics. May continued to struggle to get attention, and began lifting her shirt up. Jill asked her again to stop. Finally, an older African American woman stepped in and told May sternly, "You put your shirt down NOW!" Naturally, May obeyed.

Jill and May had to wait a long time to see the dentist. While they were waiting, a pair of older gentlemen spent some time de-constructing The Martha Stewart Show, which was playing on the office TV.

One of them said, "This is a crazy show. What's going on with this?"

"I don't know. She has this show that tells you how to do things you already know how to do. I've seen one show where she shows you how to fold laundry and another where she shows you how to set the table. Crazy show. It must be for stupid people." The other gentleman replied.

Neither gentleman commented on Martha's fake-new-england accent, nor on her empire built on selling hand towels to white folks.

I want to quickly mention one thing about my coffee situation. I did use my new thermos today and it worked very well - an entirely adequate replacement for my old thermos, but without the sentimental attachment.

However, just when I thought that my coffee situation was well settled, a distressing event occurred with my coffee maker i.e. coffee storage is secure and adequate, but coffee brewing was problematic this morning. It took nearly thirty minutes for my six cup pot of coffee to brew and I had to interrupt it to use the pause-and-pour feature in order to get a cup with breakfast.

For the record, I loathe the pause-and-pour feature because it creates an unequal distribution of the coffee strength for the batch being brewed. When one uses pause-and-pour, the first cup is stronger than the rest and all the rest of the coffee is weaker. A marxist at heart, I believe each cup of coffee should get an equal share of the boiled juice of the coffee bean.

Jill and I have been running water and vinegar through the coffee maker all day long in alternating batches in order to collect data on the situation. The assay I just finished running brewed the requisite six cups in about seven minutes, so that should be fine for tomorrow.

I had a standardized patient interview today and was not very happy with its result. The constructive feed back I recieved was to carry a clipboard instead of a little notebook. I was a little unprepared for the whole situation. I arrived thinking we were taking a patient history, and then was given the patient history before the encounter. What kind of history can I take when everything is already in the chart? So after covering the Chief Complaint and History of Present Illness I wasted a lot of time by talking slowly, taking big pauses. Honestly, I had to spend some time thinking about my next question. But my interviewer didn't like the pausing or slowness. She said, "It made me feel like you don't know what you're doing." Of course, I don't know what I'm doing, so that doesn't help much.

This standardized patient encounter was complicated by the fact that the patient desired a perscription for antibiotics to treat the apparent viral respiratory infection.

Finally, she said that I should have come right out and said that taking antibiotics when you have a viral infection is "bad for you." Instead of saying that it's not the right medicine, or the tylenol and sudafed are the right medicine. I have some ethical qualms about saying that anti-biotics are bad for you in this case. Certainly, they won't help, and, certainly, they raise the spectre of antibiotic-resistant bacteria, but I felt that telling the patient that anti-biotics would hurt her would be a misrepresentation of the risks posed by an inappropriate theraputic response.

Anyway, my biggest regret about the whole event was not standing up to my evaluator and saying 1) I needed to waste time, 2) notebook vs. clipboard is totally irrelevant, and 3) there are ethical issues at stake in the misrepresentation of the danger posed by an inappropriate therapy.

Two jobs ago, I had an almost equally hilarious assessment when my former supervisor told me, "I'm marking your 'teamwork' score as 'needs improvement' because I'm doing that for everyone this year."

Thanks.

Everyone woke up early this morning. I set my alarm for 6:45, and I remember hitting snooze, but I think everyone was up before then. May came in and told us that Pink Puppy ( a prominent stuffed animal in the pantheon) had an accident in bed. We thought that Pink Puppy might be a fall guy for the accident in bed, but as it turned out, May's bed was dry. She does a pretty good job of going all night without accidents.

Before I left for school this morning, I asked May to play quietly during Jill's afternoon nap. We'll see how that goes. Yesterday May, Jill, and Ben went apple picking with May's school. Jill didn't feel like they got enough time to pick apples.

Benjamin has been wilder than usual lately. He has developed a temper-tantrum-precursor in which, when disappointed, he runs wildly and smashes his whole body against the lower kitchen cupboards while screaming. His hot dog eating is slowing down. Mostly, I think, because I bought cheap, gritty hot dogs rather than the silky smooth Oscar Meyer that he's been enjoying so much. Yesterday he was throwing sand while playing in the sandbox and I had to close the sandbox.

I had something in my eye all morning long, but it seems to have resolved itself.

My new coffee thermos arrived in the mail today. It looks smaller, but it holds as much liquid as my old thermos; one red coffee cup plus a little extra.

At 6:30 today, fifteen minutes before the alarm went off, May got up and needed to use the bathroom. I brought her to the bathroom and helped her out, then got her back into the bed with Jill. I turned off my alarm clock and snuck down stairs without waking up anyone! I am very happy about this, as Jill, I'm sure, would like the extra sleep.

We found out yesterday that Ben's toddler music class will be delayed until after the new year. We may have to sign him up for a class that we have to pay for.

I'm a little sore from doing yoga last night, but not that bad.

This week we are learning about viruses in school. The Norwalk Cruise Ship virus has no phospholipid bilayer enveloping it, so once it gets onto something, like a cooktop or someone's hands, it cannot be removed with soap and water. Normal flu and herpes (I think) viruses do have an active membrane used in spreading infection that can be destroyed with detergent action.

The bottom line: wash your hands with soap and water a lot during flu season to keep from getting sick.

Jill was pretty crabby today when I got home. I think the kids were getting on her nerves. Right now she's out at the Junior Women's Drinking Club. Tonight they're drinking vodka tonics and having sardine-cream-cheese sandwiches with the crusts cut off as a snack.

Yesterday, on my way to the coffee shop, I saw an ambiguously gendered person with no arms. S/he had his/her shoes off and was smoking a cigarette with his/her toes.

My sister was visiting this weekend and we had a blast. Friday night (actually before my sister arrived) we had a cheesesteak binge. We ordered three of them, ate two, and saved one for later, which my sister did get to eat half of before she left on Sunday. In addition to the binge on beer and cheesesteaks, we went on a walking tour of constitutional walking tour of some historic sites in Philadelphia.

The tour was timed perfectly so that the kids fell asleep in their strollers after lunch and we enjoyed the walking tour without any screeching or weeping. The guide was very good and had some interesting factoids and quotes. For example, John Hancock was a rum runner and smuggler and, after the British confiscated a few of his ships, was very interested in taxation and representation. Also, a great quote from Benjamin Franklin, "Beer is proof that God exists and that He loves mankind." (I might be paraphrasing the quote)

The scores were returned on our pathology exams from last week and I scored very well. Every time I take an exam I have a score that I hope for within reason and also an unreasonable score that I dream about. My score was in the 'unreasonable desire' range. I bought one pathology textbook, and two review books, I read all three in addition to lecture attendance and reading the faculty lecture notes. so, I did work hard. Even though the pathology we covered was introductory material, I'm pleased to have started the year with some strong work.

May was a little bit naughty this morning. She put a big pile of her favorite stuffed animals and blankets (handkerchiefs, doll blankets, burp cloths, and cloth napkins) on the kitchen table and wouldn't remove them. We argued back and forth about them until I took them away and put them up on my dresser. Jill, bless her heart, read my intent correctly and kept the animals and blankets away from May all day long. I felt bad after leaving for school knowing that May would complain all day about the animals, and that Jill was stuck enforcing a punishment that I had decreed unilaterally. Still, the vengeful arm of justice must strike blindly and let those who bring toys to the breakfast table beware.

Ben is refusing to be seated in a high chair. Tonight at dinner he screamed all meal until he was freed, whereupon he promptly ran to the living room and dumped out a box of sixty-four crayons and several tubs of toys. Jill ran to the living room, feeling very distraught and discouraged, to clean up the disastrous mess. In the mean time, Benjamin returned to the table, pulled himself up onto his mom's chair, and ate his dinner (or at least the chicken flesh - which is all he eats these days anyhow).

Today on the train I noticed a guy was reading a printout about cheerleading. I couldn't help but read over his shoulder. Apparently, this professional cheerleader (she worked for one of the NFL teams) had worked at NASA and then went on to work as a cheerleader. The article tried to draw a lot of analogies between the two professions. It was hilarious, but in an unintentional and derisive manner.

Yesterday on the train I noticed a woman using her rosary. The Philadelphia area is a lot more catholic than Wisconsin. It's a little shocking, but not altogether unpleasant. The catholics in the area have a long and strong history of social service and activism. Of course, they have a strong anti-choice bent, but, no one's perfect.

Benjamin played a new game today. He climbs up onto his sister's bed, then sits on the edge, dangling his feet over the edge. Then, sliding forward, he jumps off the bed and lands on his feet. After squealing and running around the room, he climbs up onto the bed and does it again. On a completely different subject, he is on a strict cheese and hot dog diet.

Tonight, before bedtime, May and I played 'princess video game.' We made a princess and named her Princess Daddy. May told me that Princess Daddy had flat, blue eyes and wore glasses. When it was time to pick a body for Princess Daddy, we assigned a short, fat body. Princess Daddy got a red dress with hearts on it, a big blond wig, and bows down the front of her shirt. Later on in the evening, she told me, "I've been watching Fox News."

Yesterday on the train I rode home next to a guy with lots of tattoos on his arms. He looked middle age, though he was a heavy smoker and sometimes that gives you an early worn appearance. He got a call on his cell phone and told his friend, Gary, that he was riding the speedline home. He was wearing a t-shirt with a front pocket, blue jeans, and newer tennis shoes.

I had an argument with another med student this week. He accused Hillary Clinton of killing Vince Foster, which threw me into a rage. I don't think I called him stupid, but I think I did say that this idea was ridiculous and stupid. Then I said that I did believe in a Vast Right Wing Conspiracy and accused him of being a member. This particular student is both arrogant and naive, which is an unusual combination of obnoxious personality traits.

That night when I got home, I looked up Vince Foster on wikipedia and they presented some compelling evidence. Read for yourself: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vince_Foster#Death

As you can tell, I'm still angry about this. If this yahoo brings this up again, I'll mention the evidence of VF's suicide presented in wikipedia, and acknowledge that he doesn't necessarily need to believe in the evidence, but if he doesn't faith in logic and reason, maybe he should continue to study at a more faith based university, like maybe Oral Roberts University, and leave reason and logic to those more gifted with rational thought processes.


My new workout plan is to exercise hard every day. I want to either be working out or sore from working out.

Sadly, earlier this week I lost my coffee thermos. I will need to shell out twenty or thirty bucks for a new one. Fortunately, I found the exact same model that my friend Tony gave me years ago. It's a good thermos that keeps the coffee warm all day. Here is a product description from amzaon.com.

Nissan Travel Companion Stainless-Steel Insulated Bottle
Product Features

• Keeps beverages hot or cold for hours
• Holds nearly 26 ounces
• Easy, no-drip pouring without removing stopper
• Hand wash with mild detergent
• Five-year warranty against defects

I definitely want the 26 ounce model. Bigger than one cup, but not so big as to be unwieldy.

Benjamin has been pushing chairs around for a long time, however, today he figured out that if you push a chair over to the table, kitchen counter, or refrigerator you can climb onto the chair and access previously unreachable and forbidden areas. My cousin told me a few months ago that a friend of his told him, "Having a girl first does not prepare you for having a boy." True words, but bitter, bitter.

May was playing with her stuffed animals on the couch and beside her was her empty rocket ship (a larger basket). Ben brought his toy mop over and began to put it into the basket and began to mop. May was very upset and they fought. I settled the quarrel by explaining that Ben was only mopping out the rocket ship so it would be ready for her to fly to the moon. May told me, "Good. My animals have been pooping in the rocket ship and it needs to be cleaned."

Today I will rectify the inequality in blogging about my children. In the past, blog entries have been mostly about May, but this entry will be mostly about Benjamin, and the things he did yesterday. Our goal yesterday was to go to a Labor Day BBQ at the house of our friends, Dominick and Becky, which we finally did.

Earlier in the day, Jill was moving the family's towels and sheets from one container into a functionally equivalent container in a room next door. The moving of the sheets resulted in the fact that a new container was available in which one could slam ones finger - should you be so foolish. Benjamin slammed his finger with spectacularly bloody results. All day long I tried to bandage that bloody finger tip with no skin on it, and all day long he removed the bandages. I tried to tape the bandages on with packing tape, electrical tape, and medical tape. I taped the bandage on his thumb and wrapped the tape around his wrist; still the bandage was removed. I even taped his thumb to the side of his palm, still the bandage was removed. I must have bandaged his finger with the bloody, flappy skin twelve time. Today, he has a big scab and no bandage.

Our plan was to lunch and then go to the BBQ. We were eating lunch yesterday (I've forgotten what we were eating), and I said, "Who's looking forward to having a hot dog for dinner?" Benjamin happens to have recently developed a palate for hot dogs. However, he has not quite mastered the concept of past, present, future, and our temporal orientation (In a non-relativistic, Newtonian sense; I will not touch on time and relativity in this post. It's too broad of a subject, and quite off topic, as my kids rarely concerned with Einstinian physics.) Benjamin thought we were talking about hot dogs for lunch NOW.

"Hot dog!" He demanded. Then he pointed at the fridge and screamed. Once again, he demanded, "Hot dog!" He kept screaming and demanding a hot dog until we were able to change the subject and he forgot about it.

I hesitate to tell this story, but I should be up front about it. It's a shocking story and it almost derailed our plans to go to the BBQ. The kids were ninety percent ready to go. May was getting ready to go and Ben was all ready to go. I was trying, futilely, to print out directions to Becky and Dominick's house. Jill gave Benjamin a sippy-cup full of milk to drink. It wasn't a good Playtex sippy-cup; it was a cheap, disposable sippy-cup. Benjamin figured out long ago that a fun trick with these disposable sippy-cups is to through them on the floor, smashing them open, and spilling out the contents. This is an extra good trick, because you can both outrage your parents and manipulate them into cleaning up the mess.

So after smashing open his cup and spilling the milk everywhere, Benjamin laid down in the milk on his stomach and thrashed his arms and legs up and down, as if he was swimming. When Jill saw him, she was upset and had to change him into new clothes.

My final story from yesterday about Ben. After the party is winding down, May is watching The Little Mermaid in Becky and Dom's living room. Ben wants to go into the living room, but isn't interested in climbing down the step from the foyer into the living room. Instead, he hurls himself off the step and bell flops onto the carpeted floor of the living room. The first time it happened, I was quite alarmed . The next fifteen or twenty times he did it, he seemed to be really enjoying himself. What would be terribly painful and humiliating for me, he seemed to thing was hilariously funny and quite entertaining.

One quick story about May, then I must go put her to bed. Yesterday, May was talking about New Jersey. She said to Dom, "Would you like to buy a swamp in NJ?" and Dom said, "Sure, I would, how much would it cost?"

May replied, "One dollar."

Dom said, "A whole dollar! I don't know if I can raise that kind of capital. Do you think I could get a loan?"

And May said, "You won't have to be alone with all those things."

May even helped me write this tonight, because she sat on my lap while I was typing and was a very good girl, during the last few paragraphs, by not touching the screen, the keyboard, or anything else on my desk.

I will try to go read her bed time books with her now.

May
-a loan, alone

Today my wife and I celebrated our 6th anniversary. We got hoagies (a Philadelphia word for submarine sandwiches) and went to the park for a picnic while a neighbor watched the kids for a few hours. After the picnic we went to a shop called 'The Christmas Tree Shops' that Jill likes a lot. They have a lot of decorative things there that I am not interested in, but they do have some good deals on food and there are generally good bargains to be found. We got separated in the store when I kept nagging her about leaving and she sent me to the food section.

When we got back to the house, the kids were having a good time, but were very tired. Benjamin didn't take his afternoon nap today. Both kids were a pain in the neck all afternoon.

On the bright side, we saw Pan's Labyrinth last night and really enjoyed it. A little violent, and a little to adult-fairy-tale, but still a cool movie.

I've been hearing a lot of noise about poor Miss South Carolina lately on the internet. If you know about her geographic agnosia and have overcome the bleak depression that her comments have brought upon you and are ready to move on, check out this clip for a good yuck...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6cBQXgFn6TQ&mode=related&search=

If you haven't already seen the original, search for it on you tube first.

I feel bad because all of my extended family is visiting my grandma on Lawn Gisland this weekend, but having just gotten back from a really long vacation, we declined to attend the family function. I may try to go out for a visit during october or november. We may even go there for thanksgiving, if Jill thinks that's OK.

I have to finish writing a letter to my other grandparents tonight. They recently moved to a new nursing home in NC and I feel like I should write them more often. Grandpa is deaf as a stone and can't talk on the phone and grandma is a shade on the crazy side. So, they're good people to communicate with through written means.

Today was a nice day. Strangely, I got less sleep than usual last night (6 hours). Nevertheless, I was well prepared for class and attentive. Our last lecturer of the morning was an older German fellow who screeched on and on about autonomic nervous system receptor agonists and antagonists. While I appreciate the effort one puts into such theatrics, a wild display is not necessary for me to enjoy or appreciate the lecturer. However, I demand that a lecturer stress material that s/he feels is important.

Benjamin has been pretty wild lately. He likes to grab his little mop and broom, one in each hand and run around waving them in the air. He hates sitting still. Even more than sitting still, he hates being quiet. Unless he is banging on something with something else, he is always yelling. Having said that, (and here I risk beshriving his good fortune) it's been a long time since he fell down and got a big bruise on his face.

I clipped May's fingernails tonight before she went to bed. She doesn't always like getting her nails clipped. I always like doing things to the kids that are good for them, but that they don't like. It helps me feel like I'm getting even with them for the terrific amount of work they make me do. May doesn't like getting her hair washed or getting her nails clipped, so, of course, I like helping her with those tasks of hygiene. May has lately turned the corner on getting her nails clipped. She still doesn't like it, but she acquiesces without much fuss now. She comes and sits on my lap and we discuss which finger is getting its nail clipped, that finger's unique job, and why each finger, even the little one, is important. Even though I don't get to feel like I'm taking revenge on her for being my daughter, I still enjoy the care taking involved in clipping her finger nails. It's funny how that's changed for me.

Yesterday, I lifted weights, and bumped up my bench press weight to 135 lbs. I did one set of eight and one set of nine. I thought I'd be really sore today, and my back is a little sore, but not that bad. I think this year I'm going to try to lift twice a week, run once a week, and do yoga once a week. We'll see....

I made BBQ burgers tonight with corn and string beans.

Yesterday, I visited my friend and organic chemistry lab partner, Chris, at his new place in west Philly. It's a really nice place. He's already started his first year of med school at a different school, but still in Philadelphia. He made me some very good pancakes from scratch for brunch. These pancakes were very fluffy and airy. A remarkable treat. Afterwards we took a long walk around his campus.

Then I drove to my school, took my inaugural first-shit-of-the-second-year-of-medschool and lifted weights. After that, I came home, cleaned up a little, straightened up the house, and watched a little bit of the eagles-steelers game.

Remarkably, I drove into Philly, parked twice, each time less than two blocks from my destination, and received no parking tickets. I was also able to avoid any fender benders. Yeah!

Today was my second year orientation. After the orientation, I am excited, but nervous. There is a ton of new material to learn, but the stuff we're learning this year is what we came to school to learn.

I've got to go pick up Jill and the kids at the airport tonight. My dad is coming too. I'm really looking forward to seeing them, but I'm nervous that Jill will be angry with my dad, after having spent the weekend with him, and will wreak her vengeance upon me. I don't think their visit went as well as she had hoped. We'll see....

What better way to prepare for 2nd year of medschool than binge drinking? Thus, I met friends last night and we went to a bar called McFadden's in Philadelphia. I did a lot of drinking and a lot of dancing. Hangover today: moderate. I think I have another round of binge drinking ahead of me tonight.

A few strange things bear commenting upon from last night.

When we first got to the bar, I was shocked. "We're not going here are we?" I asked. There were a lot of good looking skinny people waiting in line to get inside. I don't know why they made us wait in line, the place wasn't very crowded. Maybe they like to make people wait just because they can.

At one point a busty bartender lined men up, back against the bar, and after wrapping a towel around each man's neck, stood on the bar and walked its length pouring a long stream of red liquor into each victims throat. The red liquor splashed all over each man's face. The psychosexual connotation is, of course, a golden shower. I don't mind being treated like that, but try not to drink anything red. Later in the night, this same bartender lost a chugging contest and the DJ kept trying to get her to do a keg stand.

At another point, the DJ promised free shots to women who would dance on the bar. They didn't have to do anything lewd, only dance, but on top of the bar as a public spectacle. Finally, a handful of women did dance on the bar. They weren't great dancers, it wasn't like Coyote Ugly at all. The women were kind of shy and didn't know quite what to do with themselves. They danced for one song, some dancing together, some separate. Then they got down from the bar to walk among the rest of us.

The music was loud, which I don't like, but at least Philly has banned smoking, so I didn't smell like smoke afterwards. I didn't know many of the songs, but when a song, or a remix of a song, I knew came on, I tried to dance with more enthusiasm. I even tried to dance like Axel Rose, but wasn't very good at it. Later in the night, Curtis danced just like Axel Rose. It was uncanny.

I met a few first years and told them things like, "Welcome to Hell" and "Enjoy Yourself!"

Though I really enjoyed myself, I was very glad not to be involved in the bar scene. What a drag it must be to squeeze into some tight jeans and go out to these places and try to attract someone. Going to the bar reminded me why I like going to bars and why I do not like going to bars.

The jury is still out on this new keyboard....