Running. Yesterday I went for a run down by cooper river. Toward the end of my run, I turn around in a park that is at the intersection of hwy 130 and S. Park Ave. It's an area where the ground is probably at or below sea level, so it floods a lot. There were about 75 Canadian geese in the park crowding around the path I run on my return. They parted quietly, waddling to the side and looking at me out of the corner of their eyes. I expected them to run or fly away, but they continued watching me silently.

Restraints. Restraints, when used in the hospital, are a problem. People who are violent need to be restrained for staff safety. However, if you are restrained for too long, your muscles atrophy and you need to go for inpatient physical therapy after you're medically stable. But, if you've been in restraints anytime in the last 48 hours, no inpatient physical therapy location will accept your transfer. Furthermore, without moving, you're more inclined to develop blood clots, and if a blood clot breaks up and goes to the lungs you develop a condition known as a pulmonary embolism (potentially life threatening and no easy treatment). Finally, it sucks to be in restraints. You can't sleep and being in restraints makes you crazier. This week, I heard a woman in restraints crying out, "OhGod PleaseHelpMe! Get Me Out of Here! Pleasepleaseplease! OhGod! Why are youdoingthis to meeeee!"

The Kids. My dad is visiting and we took the kids to the children museum. My dad followed May around and I followed Ben. Ben spent most of his time at a play construction site where you bring planks up a long winding ramp to a play house and can either hang the planks on the walls or slide them down a chute where they return to a storage bin. Ben chose to send all his planks down the chute. Then he carried them up the ramp to the house, then down the chute again. etc., etc. for 30 minutes.

My sister. When I was 8 or 9 and my sister was 2 years and nine months younger, my grandma bought us some Chinese food for my birthday. Sarah ate all the meat out of the Chinese food but nothing else. I remember being incredibly angry, "It's *my* birthday! And you ate all the meat, but nothing else! And it's *my* birthday!" Grandma Tina tried to settle me down, "ssshhh Samuel, Ssshhh. Don't make such a big deal out of it.

I'm going to come back to my blog little by little hitting the topics that have worked well for me in the past. Readers interested in politics or sports should read my friend Mike's blog (see link below).

News of the kids:
Last night, I put the kids to bed and May was upset because it was me, and not Jill, who was putting her to bed. She was crying.

"Why are you crying, honey?" I asked.
"Because Mommy isn't putting me to bed."
"Is mommy that much better at this than me?"
"Yes she is."
"Why?"
"Because she never yells at me."
"Well, I'm not yelling at you now am I?"
"No, but you do yell at me when I do something dangerous."
"Yes, that's true. But, no one is yelling now, we're just listening to poems and singing rock-a-bye-baby. OK?"
"OK, Di-di."

After I got her in bed, she ran out of her room crying and woke up her brother. This usually makes me angry. I put on a decent scowl and put her back into bed. Then I went to take care of El Destructo.

Ben had turned on his light and was putting on some clothes. He had both feet into the legs of some additional pajama pants and had put on a t-shirt such that one of his arms was sticking through the neck of the t-shirt along with his head.

"Benjamin, " I asked him, "Are you putting on your clothes and getting ready for the day?"
"Uh-huh."
"It's still night time, Ben. You need to go back to sleep."
"Oh."

He went back to sleep with no struggle.

I have been hunting mice lately, or rather, I have been catching mice with a trap lately. We purchased, several months ago, a TomCat-Live-Catch-Mouse-Trap. I rarely shill products on my blog, but let me tell you, this is a great invention. It does not kill the mice, so there is no gore to clean afterwards. No poison is needed, and no children can smash their fingers in the trap. It is a long tube balanced on a fulcrum. The mouse enters to tube to get the bait, the tube teeters to one side and the trap door shuts.

The only bad part of the trap is that it does not kill the mouse. You must either free the foul beast or dispose of it yourself.

The first mouse we caught was weeks ago. He had been coming onto the kitchen counter, scratching and gnawing the fruit. It was as if Jill got up in the middle of the night and took a bite out of each of the bananas and then ran a fine toothed comb across the peels. Jill denied doing this, so we got the Tomcat mousetrap.

After we caught the first mouse, we were having some kind of party, so I didn't get a chance to deal with it right away. He sat in the trap for over a day. Finally, I had a plan to deal with the live-trapped mouse.

I brought the trap upstairs to the bathroom and held it open over the yawning mouth of the toilet. First the mouse's thin, black, spaghetti tail whipped around the outside of the trap, and then (all the while scrabbling) he slid into the toilet. I held the plunger over his head while flushing the toilet and he was gone. Afterward, my heart thumping wildly, I urinated (also into the toilet) and flushed one more time for good measure.

The trap smelled terribly and had mouse shit in it so I had to wash it out.

**************

The second mouse trapping went much as the first, only the second mouse preferred graham crackers and Rolos.

The second mouse also had the gall to cling to the inside of the plunger while I was trying to flush him away.

I got the 2nd mouse almost right after he got into the trap, so he didn't have enough time even to finish the bait, let alone stink up the trap with his shit. I still rinsed out the trap, though. Now it is clean for its next use.

Please forgive me as I deviate from the standard spiel about taking the train to school and what my kids are doing and belabor you with politics and policies. I've been thinking about the health care system (or lack thereof) in America lately, and, though no one but my friends will read this, will write briefly about it.

I want to begin by pointing out that the corporations that sell health insurance have the sweetest plum in the health care business. Who gets sick? The people who usually get sick are the young (insured by SCHIP - a government program), the old (insured by Medicare - a government program), and the poor (insured by Medicaid - a government program). Furthermore, if you happen to get so sick that you can't work, and you lose your job, you lose your insurance and the government has to pick up the tab. See a pattern here? If it's not profitable to sell you insurance, because you might get sick, the government has to provide for you.

Many people are afraid of 'the government' telling them what kind of health care they can access. "I don't want some bureaucrat in Washington...." Instead, what people have are the actuaries in the insurance companies authorizing and denying access to care. If you happen to want a really expensive procedure that might save your life, you better check the spreadsheet first.

The term 'Health Insurance' is a misnomer anyway. People with health insurance aren't insured against catastrophic medical costs. In fact, if you have catastrophic medical costs, it's in the corporations best interest to make sure you bear as much of those costs as possible. The corporations that are good at sticking you with the bill grow and thrive, those corporations that aren't get bought out.

Given the epidemic of under-insured people, and the obvious lack of insurance provided by the insurance corporations, we need to change the nomenclature. We should begin calling these corporations Health Care Distribution Companies.

Because that's what they are. You can get the procedures, visits with specialists, and medicine that your Health Care Distribution Company authorizes.

Last night I rode my excercycle in the basement, while doing laundry, while the robot was washing the kitchen floor, and at the same time I was watching a recorded lecture. I felt productive.

Today I went out for lunch and got myself a falafel sandwich from Maoz.

We have been visiting my grandmother Bettina since Sunday and it's been very pleasant. The week before my last exam, Grandma was in a car accident and totaled her car. She had to be pulled out by the jaws of life. She thinks that she blacked out and then ran off the road. Good fortune and a graceful diety guided her car so that no one else was hurt. She told her hearing aid technician that she's decided to give up driving.

She has not yet decided to give up being driven, however, and we've been running a lot of errands with her.

Grandma has had some limited nursing care since we've been visiting, but is feeling a lot better. Apparently she cracked a few ribs during the accident and is quite sore. She's been complaining about her chest being sore the entire visit. I said to her, "Well it ought to be sore; you cracked a few ribs didn't you?"

Grandma replied, "Yes I did, but they're down here." She pointed at her hips.

Yesterday May got to watch an Animal Planet show hosted by the late Steve Irwin's ten-year-old daughter. She thought it was utterly fascinating and is the only non-cartoon television show in which she's ever really been interested. This morning May was eating her breakfast and she pointed at Jill, Grandma, the nursing aide, and her self and said "We are all females. They," pointing at Benjamin and I, "are males."

We had a terrifying moment in the bathtub a few nights ago. Grandma's bathtub is very slippery and has a slope at one end. El Destructo was scrambling around the tub and slipped, landing teeth first on the side of the tub. There was a little bit of blood on the gumline and the tooth was chipped. Jill and I were totally freaking out. I wouldn't have felt so guilty but had had a few glasses of wine and my reflexes and consequence-prediction-ability were both impaired. We took him to Grandma's dentist who said that his adult teeth would not be harmed, nothing further needed to be done, though there was a possibility that Ben's tooth would change color. Grandma's dentist didn't charge us for the visit.

El Destructo has also learned how to climb out of his pack-and-play. He climbed out during his 'nap' yesterday, ran around his room screaming, and locked the door so Jill couldn't get into the room. Jill finally picked the lock with a paper clip and took him and his sister to the park.

Last weekend (or was it the weekend before last?), the Forrest family took us out to the Academy of Natural Sciences for the morning. The kids had a great time.

Ben is a *huge* fan of Josh Forrest, the second eldest of the Forrest children. Most of the time El Destructo babbles and screeches all his communications, but I've noticed that whenever Ben thinks something is really important, he enunciates his demands or comments much better than usual. For example, when we parked at the Academy of Natural Sciences, Ben said quite clearly, "Mom, there's Josh! Mom, that's Josh! Mom, that's Josh!" He also has been none to speak quite clearly the names of other kids on the block when he wants to go play with them. When he's hungry, he let's us know, "French fries."

At the top of the Academy of Natural Sciences is an interactive display where you can look more closely at animals. May really liked this part and got to pet a guinea pig, a snake, a tortoise, and a box turtle. She really wanted to pet the legless lizard, but I didn't ask the museum lady to get that one out.

May has also been obsessed, for the last few months, with an ancient grouchy cat who lives two doors down. Frida, the ancient cat, is missing most of her teeth and mostly just sits around on the couch or the radiator. May likes to pet Frida and swaddle her gently in blankets. All the attention May gives to Frida attracts the other kids who are not quite so gentle with Frida. Everytime I see the kids flinging that old, arthritic cat around the house, I become the "Frida-Avenger."

"Put Frida down!" I shout.

Yesterday, I worked on the bathroom sink, which has been draining slowly. I got the plunger and plunged and plunged. Large greasy, gray-black, blobs of soap scum came swirling into the sink. Some were as big as a large marble. Jill was grossed out by this, and quickly came to clean the sink after I was done. We are both happier about the sink draining better after the eviction of the soap scum.

Jill fixed the doorknob on our bedroom yesterday too. It was a little loose, leading us both to fear that one day you would try to turn it and it would fall off in your hand. Anticipation of this event lends to oneself an unnecessary anxiety. After all, if it does happen, one simply picks up the pieces and sticks them into the apparatus, convincing the gears and latches to fulfill their ambitions. I suppose we have a little more anxiety about doorknobs falling apart because the kids are around and they could destroy or lose a doorknob propelling a despondent father to make yet another trip to Home Depot.

Our neighbors had us over for fondue last night. We had bread and cheese for one course then swordfish and chicken in broth for the next. Dessert was chocolate and fruit. It was fun and the kids had a great time. Ben found some Toxic Avenger dolls (action figures - sorry) and enjoyed playing with them and thinking about them. May always had a good time visiting with their friendly, ancient (17 yrs old) cat, Frida. She wraps Frida in blankets and kisses her everytime they meet.

News Of The Kids

This morning, as I was getting ready to leave for school, May came downstairs and said to me, "Di, I have a surprise present for you."

"Oh, what is it?"

"Here you go!" She said, as she gave me two pennies.

"Oh, two pieces of money!" I replied. "Do you know what Daddy likes to do with money?"

"Give it to the bank." She told me.

Benjamin came downstairs to see me off to school, too. After I put my backpack on, he put his on too. Then, he pointed at the door and asked me, "Eh?" When it became clear to him that he was not going to go to school with me, he got pouty and sulky. He was angry enough to refuse me a goodbye kiss this morning.

News Of The Weekend

On Friday, we went to the Asian Students group Lunar Banquet. It was a lot of fun. I drank a lot and there was a ton of really good food. My favorite dishes were a creamy sweet broccoli and shrimp dish and a really sour pork dish. Also the eggplant in garlic sauce was to-die-for.

Saturday we went to the grocery store and then in the afternoon I went for a run. I took May in the joggin stroller (rather than Ben0 and she seemed to enjoy it. She fell asleep near the end of the run.

Sunday, we made a roast beef and watched some TV. Then Jill and I had a fight about whether or not we would fly to wisconsin for a fundraising party my dad is having for his chamber orchestra. The jury is still out on who won the fight.

Despite having a fight on the tail end of the weekend, it was very relaxing and fun.

One of my daughter's stuffed animals, a beanie babie rhooster, is named Gloria. This silly toy has caused Laura Brannigan's song, "Gloria," to be running through my head for days. I think they've got your number, Gloria, I think they've got your alias, Gloria, that you've been living under.

Ben hurt his wrist last week and we finally got him in for an xray last night. It turns out he has a 'buckle fracture' of his forearm. He goes tomorrow for his cast. Even thought he favors and protects that arm a lot, he's still a lot of fun. We had a good time at the radiologists office. As I was waiting for them to finish the paperwork, he climbed up chairs and peeped over dividers while screeching and slobbering. Finally, we got put in a tiny waiting room with an accordion door - great for a wild, hollering peek-a-boo game. Having gotten it out of his system, he was very good about holding his arm still for the Xray.

May has had the stomach flu lately, but has developed a morally questionable behavior of borrowing without asking (a fine line from theft). We're not too sure what to do about this, but I think we're going to institute a few punishments that involve the donation of some of her toys to charity.

It's been cold in the Philly area lately, yesterday was a high of 18 degrees - coldest day of the year I think. It's snowing right now; big, soft flakes like torn cotton balls.

I'll try to post a little bit more often, but the boards are on the horizon and....

This morning, May woke us up and came into our bedroom. She does this most mornings, but today she told me, "It was dark when I came into your room, I saw a scary shadow, which turned out to be a pile of clothes. But I knew I would be OK because you were here."

My presence may be reassuring to her, but not to our toilet. I broke the toilet yesterday, but was pleased to find that Jill and Ben fixed it while I was at school. I felt so bad about breaking the toilet that I fixed the screen door. The spring that slows the closing of the screen door was cracking the frame. I inched the spring over to cover the crack and reattached the mounting of the spring to the door frame in such a way as to avoid a further splitting of the door frame and a reinforcement of the cracked surface. I was very proud of myself as it only took me about 15 minutes (with Jill's help at some critical junctures) and I didn't have to go to the hardware store.

Benjamin was kind of naughty tonight. He kept turning off the water as I was trying to fill the bathtub. Finally, I warned him that if he turned off the water again, I would have to put him in his crib while the tub was filling. He wasn't angry about going into his crib. He made some noises, "mama mama mama." Then, when I got him out, he was willing to let the tub fill.

Yesterday, I ground up some unlabeled coffee beans in hope that they were caffeinated. Everything seemed to be going fine until I got off my train. When leaving the subway, I couldn't decide which set of stairs to take. Should I take the north stairs or the south stairs? Then, when I got above ground, I couldn't decide in which building I should study; library or alumni hall? Finally I stumbled to the library cafe and got some caffeine from a machine that urinates coffee into a cup. It was OK coffee.

Unfortunately, I've adulturated the pure caffienated coffee with the flavored uncaffienated coffee. My plan this morning was to mix the gross Martinson's coffee (a suboptimal pre-ground variety) with the adulturated Melitta. I added enough Martinson's to ensure adequate caffiene dosing and enough adulturated-flavored-decaf/Melitta to palliate the granular-dirty flavor of the Martinsons.

In fairness, Jill warned me that the coffee I might drink yesterday could be decaf. I told her, "I'm prepared for that possibility."

Miraculously, the Giants squeaked by the Cowboys in the second round of the NFL playoffs on Sunday. I couldn't believe it. The Giants have no real running back, no defense, and an-occaisionally-passable-brother-of-a-great-quarterback. In a rare freak event, the Packers will host them Sunday at 6:30 EST.

I try to prepare myself for disappointment, but it's hard not to be optimistic. The Packers had ABSOLUTELY NO CHANCE going down to Dallas to play on astroturf before Jerry Jones' God. Dallas really has some legitimate talent, too. Their QB is the real deal, Romo is not brother-of-the-real-deal.

The Packers stumbled ass backwards into a great season. They got some new rookies, Jones WR, and their defense has really come together. They have a couple of no-name running backs that seem to be kicking serious ass, and they've managed to cling to their two excellent tackles and rebuild the interior of their O line. The D line, with no stars save the over-hyped KGB, seems to be playing well too. Brett Favre has more than one receiver who can catch the ball, and even a few who are fast.

I honestly cannot believe this situation. As you may be able to tell, I'm trying to gear up for a major disappointment.

Go Pack Go!!

I went to Kenosha to visit my mom and attend Charlie Malinsky's wake. Mom was pretty broken up about it, she had a hard time dealing with her grief. They had been partners in a law practice and more. Charlie was cremated, at his own insistence, and the pictures of him that they had really reminded us of the things we liked best about him. He loved to cook and sail. He loved his dog, Smitty. He was always a big fan and supporter of yours truly. His kids have been great to my mom since I've been out East; they shovel her snow and help her with her car sometimes. He was always generous to a fault. I had a hard time dealing with his generosity, I always judged him to be bad at business. I hope a wiser judge is ruling on his case now.

I was glad I went, but I missed my train on the return flight and chose to spend the night in the airport rather than pay for a cab home. That sounds like something a crazy-street-person might do, but actually, airports are pretty safe. Everyone who gets into the airport has to pay at least $200, they don't have any weapons, and they certainly don't have any toiletries larger than 3 oz. I found a bench with no arm rests that I slept on. If was comfortable, except for the but-contoured-seating that kept spearing me. I would sleep for 45 minutes or so and then wake up. I caught the 5:09 AM train out of the airport and got home at 6. I slept in until 9 AM. I used the $40 I saved in cab fair to take Jill and the kids to Old Country Buffet the next day. I also bought some diapers.

Ben has figured out how to use the sink drain. He shuts the drain, turns on the water, and splashes like crazy in this creation.

Last week, May came in to the kitchen while we were cleaning up and said, "Guess what? Benjamin and I just traded cookies! I game him my cookie, he gave me his cookie!"

Jill, "Oh."

Me, "Did you get a larger portion of cookie from him than the one you gave?"

May grinned from ear to ear and said "YES!"

We didn't have a party to go to last night, so Jill babysat for our friends Kris and Keith on New Year's Eve. We were torn about it, but they had a party to go to and we didn't want to hire a babysitter and go to a bar or restaurant where we didn't know anyone, and, other than my wife, no-one wants to babysit on NY'sE. If you don't have kids, wouldn't you rather go out and party?

Anyway, I stayed up late riding my excercycle and reading. Then just before midnight, I called Jill on the phone and we counted down together.

Because we were up so late, the kids got up extra early. May woke up about 6:30, and Ben a short while later. Ben screamed and yelled to make certain that neither of his parents could sleep.

After breakfast, Ben cheered up. He blew on his kuzoo (shaped like a trumpet) and ran around in a twelve-inch-diameter circle, alternately jumping and flapping his arms. May quietly read The Lorax and said, "Quiet, Benjamin. I'm trying to read."

My mom's ex-law partner died on Sunday, so I'm flying to Ohare today. I fly back very late tomorrow.