Today was a nice day. Strangely, I got less sleep than usual last night (6 hours). Nevertheless, I was well prepared for class and attentive. Our last lecturer of the morning was an older German fellow who screeched on and on about autonomic nervous system receptor agonists and antagonists. While I appreciate the effort one puts into such theatrics, a wild display is not necessary for me to enjoy or appreciate the lecturer. However, I demand that a lecturer stress material that s/he feels is important.

Benjamin has been pretty wild lately. He likes to grab his little mop and broom, one in each hand and run around waving them in the air. He hates sitting still. Even more than sitting still, he hates being quiet. Unless he is banging on something with something else, he is always yelling. Having said that, (and here I risk beshriving his good fortune) it's been a long time since he fell down and got a big bruise on his face.

I clipped May's fingernails tonight before she went to bed. She doesn't always like getting her nails clipped. I always like doing things to the kids that are good for them, but that they don't like. It helps me feel like I'm getting even with them for the terrific amount of work they make me do. May doesn't like getting her hair washed or getting her nails clipped, so, of course, I like helping her with those tasks of hygiene. May has lately turned the corner on getting her nails clipped. She still doesn't like it, but she acquiesces without much fuss now. She comes and sits on my lap and we discuss which finger is getting its nail clipped, that finger's unique job, and why each finger, even the little one, is important. Even though I don't get to feel like I'm taking revenge on her for being my daughter, I still enjoy the care taking involved in clipping her finger nails. It's funny how that's changed for me.

Yesterday, I lifted weights, and bumped up my bench press weight to 135 lbs. I did one set of eight and one set of nine. I thought I'd be really sore today, and my back is a little sore, but not that bad. I think this year I'm going to try to lift twice a week, run once a week, and do yoga once a week. We'll see....

I made BBQ burgers tonight with corn and string beans.

Yesterday, I visited my friend and organic chemistry lab partner, Chris, at his new place in west Philly. It's a really nice place. He's already started his first year of med school at a different school, but still in Philadelphia. He made me some very good pancakes from scratch for brunch. These pancakes were very fluffy and airy. A remarkable treat. Afterwards we took a long walk around his campus.

Then I drove to my school, took my inaugural first-shit-of-the-second-year-of-medschool and lifted weights. After that, I came home, cleaned up a little, straightened up the house, and watched a little bit of the eagles-steelers game.

Remarkably, I drove into Philly, parked twice, each time less than two blocks from my destination, and received no parking tickets. I was also able to avoid any fender benders. Yeah!

Today was my second year orientation. After the orientation, I am excited, but nervous. There is a ton of new material to learn, but the stuff we're learning this year is what we came to school to learn.

I've got to go pick up Jill and the kids at the airport tonight. My dad is coming too. I'm really looking forward to seeing them, but I'm nervous that Jill will be angry with my dad, after having spent the weekend with him, and will wreak her vengeance upon me. I don't think their visit went as well as she had hoped. We'll see....

What better way to prepare for 2nd year of medschool than binge drinking? Thus, I met friends last night and we went to a bar called McFadden's in Philadelphia. I did a lot of drinking and a lot of dancing. Hangover today: moderate. I think I have another round of binge drinking ahead of me tonight.

A few strange things bear commenting upon from last night.

When we first got to the bar, I was shocked. "We're not going here are we?" I asked. There were a lot of good looking skinny people waiting in line to get inside. I don't know why they made us wait in line, the place wasn't very crowded. Maybe they like to make people wait just because they can.

At one point a busty bartender lined men up, back against the bar, and after wrapping a towel around each man's neck, stood on the bar and walked its length pouring a long stream of red liquor into each victims throat. The red liquor splashed all over each man's face. The psychosexual connotation is, of course, a golden shower. I don't mind being treated like that, but try not to drink anything red. Later in the night, this same bartender lost a chugging contest and the DJ kept trying to get her to do a keg stand.

At another point, the DJ promised free shots to women who would dance on the bar. They didn't have to do anything lewd, only dance, but on top of the bar as a public spectacle. Finally, a handful of women did dance on the bar. They weren't great dancers, it wasn't like Coyote Ugly at all. The women were kind of shy and didn't know quite what to do with themselves. They danced for one song, some dancing together, some separate. Then they got down from the bar to walk among the rest of us.

The music was loud, which I don't like, but at least Philly has banned smoking, so I didn't smell like smoke afterwards. I didn't know many of the songs, but when a song, or a remix of a song, I knew came on, I tried to dance with more enthusiasm. I even tried to dance like Axel Rose, but wasn't very good at it. Later in the night, Curtis danced just like Axel Rose. It was uncanny.

I met a few first years and told them things like, "Welcome to Hell" and "Enjoy Yourself!"

Though I really enjoyed myself, I was very glad not to be involved in the bar scene. What a drag it must be to squeeze into some tight jeans and go out to these places and try to attract someone. Going to the bar reminded me why I like going to bars and why I do not like going to bars.

The jury is still out on this new keyboard....

AAARRRRRGGGGHHHHH! I am trying to get my new laptop set up and am angry, angry, angry. I was unable to use my old copy of symantec antivirus, which means I have to switch to McAffee (wierd...) which was included on the new machine and is compatible with windows vista. I got some heartening advice that it was easy to install XP, so I tried it. It may be easy for some, but not for me.

Unfortunately, manufacturer drivers were only available for Windows Vista. I tried looking on OEM sites, and after a few hours, ran out of time. I will have to run an 'out-of-the-box' restore to return the laptop to factory condition. Then I will have to figure out a way to make sure that the McAfee virus protection stays up to date.

More depressingly, I will be unable to avoid the new headaches and heartaches that micro$oft has forced upon me by, once again, changing their fucking menus, buttons, and control panels.



On a brighter note, I put the last coat of polyurethane on the bedroom floor this morning. It looks great. When Jill arrives on Monday evening, she'll be pleased.

Later tonight, I'm going out for a 'post-exam party.' Second year students haven't had an exam, but we get to tag along with the first year student party. Some folks from my study group and I will go for a few hours.

I arrived in NJ at 12:30 AM today (that's technically today, though I would consider it last night because I slept after my arrival.) I woke up at 8:30 AM to go get some blood work done at the doctor's office. They drew their blood, then I went to the post office to priority mail Jill's driver's license back to her. After that, I went to the hardware store to look at wood stains. Then, home for lunch. While my lunch was cooking, I had a long phone chat with my dad. After lunch, I went to the library and signed Ben up for a music class for toddlers. I think he'll love it. Also, I checked out a book for myself, "The man who mistook his wife for a hat," by Oliver Sacks. It's a neurology case studies book, but is well written and interesting enough to be read by non-neurologists (or so I'm told - we'll see).

After the library, I went to the grocery store and got some stuff for dinner today, tomorrow, and Thursday. Today, tuna mac; tomorrow; salmon with green beans and potatoes; Thursday, turkey chili and grilled cheese sandwich. After the grocery store, I came back home and unloaded the groceries, then I moved all furniture and everything else out of my bedroom.

After moving everything out of the bedroom, I went to home depot and rented two large machines used for refinishing floors; a drum sander and an edger. I got home, unloaded the machines, made dinner, and started sanding at 7:15. I finished sanding at about 10:40, and my next door neighbor helped me load the drum sander back into the car.

It sounds like I did a lot today, and I guess I did, but I never felt panicked or rushed. I often thought to myself throughout the day, "Should I hurry and get this done so I can do the next thing on my list?"

"Nah..."

The kids are with Jill back in Wisconsin. They are eating her alive.

We watched the last episode of The Tudors on Jill's parent's On Demand digital cable. The show features King Henry the Eighth of England. He is, of course, a barbarian. Still, he has some qualities worth emulating. He is smooth with the ladies. He is well dressed. And, he has great abs. I've never had any of those qualities, but if I can dream of being the king of new jersey, I can also dream about having great abs.

I'm almost out of stories about my mom. One last story about her, though, and then onto the standard cute stories about my kids. When we were visiting my mom, I went for a run down by the lake. Naturally, I got quite sweaty. The sweaty shirt I wore for the run was in my sister's room (we always sleep in my sisters room when we visit my mom). The next day, my mom is parading around in my running shirt. It's flattering that she likes to wear my clothes, but when I realized she was wearing my running shirt, I asked her, "Isn't that shirt a little damp, mom?"

"Why, yes, it is a little damp."

"That's because I wore it while running yesterday. It was drenched with sweat and has dried out a little."

"Oh, I thought it was recently out of the wash."

Yuck.

May has recently been interested in watching "The Lorax." While we were camping up north, we even played a lorax-like game in which one stands on a tree stump and shouts. During the campout, she kept rolling onto me in the tent and finally I pinned her down with an arm so I could get some sleep. She eventually settled back to sleep, and quietly murmured, "I speak for the trees."

Ben took a bad tumble out of Jill's parents RV during the camping trip. Jill's dad was watching him, and went on watching him as he fell down the RV steps and bounced his head off of the metal landing in front of the steps. Ben had a small cut in the middle of a huge bump above his left eye. I was really angry and worried that he would have a concussion after a fall like that.

First I yelled, "Goddammit, Sandy!"

"He's so fast, I turned away for one second..."

I yelled at Jill's dad, "Sandy you were supposed to be watching him. 'Watching' means with your eyes! It's hard enough to go camping with a one year old! It's hard enough to have a family!"

A few seconds later I said, "I'm sorry. I was frightened."

Sandy is a good guy and didn't get sore about it. Ben was fine afterwards. Normal appetite, normal balance, normal sleep patters. I didn't bother taking him to the doctor.

On Saturday, we met our friends Jamie and Howard for a donut breakfast at Lane's Bakery. May ate three donuts and had a stomachache afterwards. Ben ate no doughnuts and cried and clung to his mom the entire breakfast. After breakfast, we went to the farmers market. I hate the central Madison farmers market.

My hate is a composite of multiple feelings.

1. I do not like expensive things (except for sushi)
2. I do not like crowds
3. I do not like tourist traps

Jill decided she would stroll May around while doing the shopping. My job at the farmers market was to stroll Ben around until he fell asleep. I made the strategic error of getting a balloon tied to his stroller. He was way too excited to sleep while he could wrangle with a helium balloon. So I went to the Jazzman, a men's clothing store in downtown Madison, to do some shopping of my own. Usually the Jazzman has clothes that are made for people who are thinner and more wealthy than me. However, a few days earlier, I had noticed a faux vintage shirt in the window that I wanted to purchase.

The shirt is a yellow Milwaukee Brewers shirt. It is faux faded with faux blotches of color on it from faux uneven washings. The faux damaged print is of three clearly German brewmeisters riding an enormous keg of beer. I really, really wanted to buy the shirt but now I have some reservations.

If you think about it, the whole faux vintage thing is ridiculous. Why throw out a perfectly good old t-shirt and buy one that looks old but isn't? Ridiculous.

Also, am I a poser by pretending to like the Brewers when I can barely name one player on the team? I prefer to think that I am displaying home-state pride rather than being a poser.

I just got a really large life insurance policy, so if you're planning to kill me, now would be a good time.

I haven't posted much since we've arrived here in Madison, WI. We've spent a lot of time visiting friends. Last night, we went to Sa Bai Thong, my favorite Thai restaurant. I had the Gaeng Phet Fach Tong. Delish!

Two nights ago my friend, Rakesh, had a party at his house and all of my friends (except Brian, Megan, and Jason) in Madison came. It was great to see them. There was an elaborate spread of food with cupcakes, lamb biryani, jambalaya, taziki, and chips/salsa. I ate too much and drank too much. The afternoon before the party, I did some racing with my friend Jamie and Howard. The wind was strong and steady; the sun was warm and shining. It was fantastic weather for sailing.

Visiting everyone reminded me that it is the people inhabiting a place which makes the place special and unique.

Tomorrow, I help my inlaws load a mountain of boxes into their RV for the first part of their move. Later this morning I'll do some yoga and watch TV.

One quick funny story about my mom before I go. Before my cousin's wedding, my wife and sister took my mom shopping for clothes. In the first store, the changing room (where one tries the fit of the clothes one is considering for purchase) was seperate from the public by a curtain which my mom either neglected to notice or decided not to use.

Always helpful, my wife told her, "Nancy, let me help you with this." Jill closed the curtain for her, mentally making an allowance for my mom by allocating the immodest behavior to my mom's meager techinical abilities - i.e. my mom was not able to master the privacy curtain technology, must have been frustrated, and decided not to use it.

However, the changing room at the next store had a more standard privacy technology, a door. Again, my mom gave everyone a peep show until my wife closed the door for her.

I feel as if I were Bilbo Baggins after he wrote his famous prequel, 'There and Back Again.' We've returned from Oregon and my cousin Michael's wedding and the kids, Jill, and I are exhausted. Our flight from LAX to OHR was delayed and we arrived in Chicago about 9:30. Our bags got screwed up and we weren't able to collect them until about 10:45 PM. Finally we took the shuttle over to the hotel for the hotel parking and got on the road around 11:30 PM. We arrived in Madison about 2:10 AM and I was asleep at 2:15 AM CST. We woke up at the hotel in Bend, OR at 4 AM PST, which is quite early, but I was able to take a nap on the plane for about 30 minutes.



My cousin's wedding was a lot of fun and a great cermony. It's nice to see him settled down with a real beautiful woman who is so kind and friendly. It's also nice to see him married into a large family. My daughter got to be a flower girl at the wedding, which I think she may remember, even now, a few days later. Apparently, my daughter did some last minute negotiating with the bride and only agreed to fulfill her flower girl duties on the condition that she get to carry the bouquet after the wedding. When I found May carrying around the bouquet after the wedding, I was mortified. Because of the confidential nature of the bride-flowergirl negotiations, I thought she had swiped the Bridal Bouquet. Only later did Kelly, the bride, tell me the tale of the aisle-side negotiations. In a few weeks, I'll post a picture of my daughter in the flowergirl dress.



Ben was too crabby to see the wedding.

A few unusual events at the wedding deserve comments.

A woman attending the wedding had very large ears. She was a normal, attractive, young woman. She was dressed well and attended by a handsome companion (I believe they were unmarried). She was a tall brunette and at the reception and wedding had her hair pulled back behind her enourmous ears. I, myself being of the large auricular appendages, am sympathetic to the cause of the large ear-ed. Still, I thought, "Why not wear your hair down?" Her ears were large, protruding, and highly circular and symmetric. An attractive young woman with very large ears.

Secondly, at the reception, I was waiting in line for the bathroom when a middle-age/retirement-age woman came out of the bathroom. She looked me right in the eye and cackled hideously. I kept my silence and thought to myself, "What's so funny?" Upon entering the bathroom I smelled a very foul odor. The older woman had clearly taken a shit and stunk up the bathroom at the wedding reception. I try never to shit at a party, so she must have really had to go. Anyway, old ladies stinking up the bathroom with their foul bowels is noteworthy.

Today we fly out of ohare airport in chicago for my cousin's wedding in Bend, OR. I am not looking forward to this grueling journey.

The kids are sick and we had to take them to the emergency room here in Kenosha (not an emergency, except that our insurance covers emergency room visits when we are out of new jersey, but not standard doctor visits). The kids both have pink eye and Ben has an ear infection. I thought the nursing care at the ER in Ktown was excellent. I usually don't completely evaluate the doctor until a few weeks have passed; if in hindsight, I feel like the problem has been adequately addressed, I'll be happy with the doctor. It was a fast trip too, probably only because the ER was not very busy, but we were in and out in two and a half hours. A record setting performance.

Benjamin has learned to enjoy chicken wings. He loves to screech around the house chewing on one for breakfast, lunch, or dinner. He also has learned to say, "Smit - tee."

Both kids have really enjoyed my mom's dog, despite the fact that he's terribly ill-suited for my mom's life style. One thing in smitty's favor is that he is also incredibly tolerant. You can pull on his ears and swat his nose all day long, he barely notices.

After Ben went to sleep the other night, Smitty was howling. My mom sent him to his room, and Smitty got a time out. May was very interested in Smitty's time-out. She asked, "How long will Smitty have his time out for?" Then she asked, "Does he have to go right to bed?" May really liked seeing someone else get a time out. Smitty did not cry a lot when he got his time out. He was rather stoic about receiving his punishment.

The list below is the contents of my mom's 'silverware' drawer. I loosely call its contents silverware as this is the drawer in my mom's house where one has the highest probability of finding a piece of silverware that one might desire to use, for eating, or whatever. Many people use a tray to organize silverware. These conformist robots foolishly sort the silverware into seperate sections of the tray so that each time you reach for a desired piece, be it knife, or fork, or spoon, your hand easily finds the piece of silverware and withdraws it.

Now I ask you, where is the challenge in that? Isn't it more exciting to get a mild surprise when you want to get a fork or knife and instead withdraw a nearly-as-useful spoon?

Contents follow:

• Assorted miscellaneous flatware
• 2 packs Captain's Wafers: Cream Cheese and Chives Crackers
• 1 wire wisk
• 8 lids to sour cream, cottage cheese, yogurt containers
• 3 pickle jar lids
• 1 peanut butter jar lid, well cleaned
• 1 can of Chicken of the Sea Pink Crab
• 2 packets of soy sauce, Kimlan
• several ounces of whole cashews, roasted, salted, and stale
• spatula
• shears
• garlic press
• 36" gold-colored chain
• 1 pack Aqua drops breathmints
• 12 pieces, individually wrapped, Nicorette gum
• 1 pie knife
• 3 packets containing one moist towlette per packet
• 1 baking spatula
• 1 set disposable chopsticks
• 1 plastic grocery bag
• 1 potato peeler
• 1 corn holder
• 1 package of seeds
• 1 rubber band
• paperclips
• Roland kobe style mustard
• several twisty ties
• 1 fine tip artists paint brush, stained and battered
• 1 charcoal pencil
• 1 paring knife sharpener taped to a 3x5 piece of corrugated cardboard

I am writing today's blog entry while visiting my mom in Kenosha, Wisconsin. We're having a nice visit with my mom and dad. Last night, Jill and I went out ona pub crawl with our friend Brian. We visited the following three bars: The Port of Kenosha, the Boathouse, and Paddy-O's. At Paddy-O's, we ran into my friend Erik. Erik and I grew up as nearby neighbors, and were very good friends in high school. He and his mom fed me almost one million lunches. We used to watch 'The days of our lives' soap opera and have lunch at his house all the time when we were in high school.

I was very happy to see him as We've lost touch over the past six years. He was very happy to see me. I used to think Erik was crazy, but I've realized in the past few years that he is a normal russian. He showed his pleasure by smashing his wine glass and giving me a big furry kiss on the lips. Then we watched some You-Tube videos on his computer projector. I made him watch a Shakira parody video that I think is hilarious. It's got a big fat white guy in a blond wig who dances around as 'Shakira.' I take ironic pleasure in this particular video, because I actually have no clue who Shakira is and, really, know nothing about her place in the American pop culture pantheon.

My mom, for those who don't know her, is a little unconventional. She is a well educated woman and has a professional practice and dabbles in art and literature. Despite this, she owns as a pet a blue tick coon hound, Smitty. Smitty would be a great dog to release in the north woods of wisconsin, and wait until his thunderous howl alerts you to the fact that he's cornered a racoon in a tree. Like most Blue Tick Hounds, Smitty's voice carries well over distances of several miles - very useful for finding him after he's accomplished his mission.

While Smitty's powerful voice is useful in hunting situations, it detracts slightly from his charm here in suburban Kenosha. I had just gotten my daughter to sleep upstairs and a few minutes later heard her and her brother screaming. I ran upstairs.

"May, why did you scream and wake up your brother like that?" Waking up your brother is an offense for which one sometimes can get a time-out.

"But dad, Benjamin woke me up, and Smitty woke him up."

"Oh, honey, I'm sorry."

Benjamin is now climbing in and out of my mom's file boxes and screaming.

Forgot to include details about our trip up til now. The drive was pretty uneventful until now. The trip from Philly to Pittsburgh was relatively uneventful and we enjoyed visiting Jill's cousins and their kids. We spent the night, and the next day I took a long afternoon nap and then we drove all night to get from Pittsburgh to Chicago. At about 5 AM, we were driving through Gary, IN and almost done with the trip when a terrible rainstorm enveloped us. Visibility was low and we crawled along at 35 MPH while compound semi truck trailers splashed torrents all around our tiny SUV.

It was terrifying, but productive. Nothing like a jolt of terror and brush with the grim reaper on I94 to wake one up after driving all night.

We had a great time visiting Jill's brother, sister-in-law, and our nieces, and 6 wk old nephew. It was a blast.

Some of you know I have been running for occasional exercise. I bought a special running shirt that is one size too small for me. It is a red t-shirt (size medium) that says 'Jersey' and has a picture of a devil on it. The 'Jersey Devils' must be some kind of a sports team. I wanted to have a shirt that was too small to wear while I was running because my normal size shirts occasionally give me a severe nipple chafing while my enormous man-boobs bounce up and down against my t-shirt. Anyway, I saw some plain gray t-shirts at Walgreens that were $1 (with the purchase of a bottle of sunscreen), but I felt like I could do better than that. Sure enough, a super cheesy home made jersey devils shirt turns up, sized properly, for sixty cents, with no epithelium preserving ointment purchase required.

Moving on to news of the kids:

In order to get my daughter out of the house in a normal human amount of time, I have a creed that I recite with her before we go places. It goes as follows:

- Rule number one: Must wear clothes
- Rule number two: Must wear sunscreen
- Rule number three: Must wear shoes
- Rule number four: (the most important rule of them all) Obey your father

When I'm trying to get May to go somewhere, I go through the list to remind her of The Rules. The other day I caught her telling some of her rules to her stuffed animals. May's rules for her animals are as follows:

- Rule number one: Must saw wood
- Rule number two: Must dig holes



Ben has a new tool for manipulating me. He stumbles around, like he is having trouble walking, then when I hold out my hand to offer support. He grabs my hand and leads me to something that he feels needs to be done. The other day, he led me to the front door and stood there looking at it, as if he was thinking, "Here we are at the front door. How long will it take dad to realize that I would like the door to be opened for me?"

One last story about May. She has been potty training lately, and got up in the middle of the night. She needs to go to the bathroom, but doesn't really know it. So, I take her to the toilet and get her settled. She says to me, "Dad, will you marry me?"

"I'm already married to mommy, sweetheart."

"BUT WHO WILL MARRY ME?!" She cries and screams.

"When you find a man who loves you as much as daddy does, you'll know that he's the right guy to marry." Good advice?

I've been doing EBay a lot lately - but SELLING not buying! It's actually very exciting. It has all the 'turn-your-trash-into-cash' giddiness, but none of the irritating 'be-nice-to-a**holes-who-want-to-bargain-you-down-25-cents-on-your-old

-van-halen-cassettes' pitfalls. Very little human contact is involved. They buy my crap, I send it. I've also learned how to collect money via paypal, which makes it a lot easier. I also get m money a lot faster when I use paypal. I'm very close to going to an 'only paypal' Ebay selling dogma.

I'll be honest too - I like going to the post office. All the rows and rows of stamps lend an ordered and calming feel to my perception of the universe.

Jill finished painting May's room today, so May is sleeping in our room on the inflatable mattress. This means I have to be super quiet when going to bed.

Tomorrow I'm going into Philly to lift weights and have lunch with a friend.

On Tuesday, we’re leaving for a drive to Chicago with an overnight stop in Pittsburgh, at Jill’s cousin’s house. My plan is to stay up late once we arrive in Pittsburgh and to take a long afternoon nap before we leave in the early evening. Then we’ll drive all night to Chicago. We’ll spend three days and two nights with Jill’s brother in Chicago before driving to Kenosha to spend until August 2^nd at my mom’s house. On August 2^nd, my mom, Jill, the kids, and I will take a flight to Bend, Oregon to celebrate Michael and Kelly’s wedding. The resort looks great and even has a childcare facility at which we can leave May while Jill and I do some bicycle riding on their extensive nature trails.

We return from Oregon the evening of August 6^th, and will drive from Ohare airport to Madison, WI. We’ll visit with friends and do some relaxing in Madison until August 15^th, when I will help Jill’s parents move out of their condominium in Madison and into their new house in rural Wisconsin. I hope to leave Wisconsin and begin the drive back to Philadelphia on August 19^th or 20^th. Jill will stay a little while longer with her parents and do some additional visiting with some of her friends.

If I survive this ridiculous and suicidal vacation, I start my second year of med school on Aug 27th. Good luck and god bless.

This morning Benjamin had a procedure done in which the ophthamologist opens his tear duct, which has been clogged - causing continuous gunky-eye. The procedure went fine, but afterwards he was very wobbly (from anesthetic) and has been crabby all day. My job has been to keep May out of his way. Even though I don't think she's any more likely than usual to damage her brother's eyes, she has the potential to hit him in a new weak spot.

May and I took the car to get an oil change, browsed at the Italian deli, Severino's, got some ice cream, and then went and got her hair cut. May has a particular stylist she goes to at the Hair Cuttery who does a great job. Right now, May is trying to use the potty. If she's succesful, we'll play video games from the Curious George website.

While May and I were out running errands, Ben was home with Jill. He got up from a *very* long nap and Jill let him run around without a diaper on. Ben promptly relived himself in both ways. Ben hasn't been feeling well lately and has a bit of diarhea. His waste splashed on the floor in every direction and he promptly splashed himself into it, through it, and around the living room. It took Jill a long time to get things cleaned up. That must have happened while May and I were at the ice cream shop. May had vanilla custard. I had vanilla custard topped with lemon flavored Italian water ice (a local treat; called a 'gelati').

Loyal blog readers will know that my cousin gave me some suits. I tried to get one altered to fit me, but the tailor told me the suit was too big. It would have cost almost as much as a new suit to get it fit, and it would never look quite right (pocket would be too low, coat would be too long, etc). As it turns out, my cousins rehearsal dinner is a picnic, so I probably don't need a second suit. Instead, I'll go in a shirt and tie to the rehearsal.

Tonight I will ride my excercycle and read my biochemistry review book while Jill attends the Junior Women's Drinking Club of Collingswood. Last night I installed a magical garbage can which hides under the sink and rolls out of its den on silent wheels when called upon to store our trash.

Join me in celebrating the overthrow of the French despotic monarchy three hundred years ago. though there were no (or almost none) prisoners being held in the Bastille when it was torn down, the destruction of this monarchist political prison is the symbolic event that represents the advent of the French republic. Vive La France!

We went to a Bastille Day party down the street at the house of our friends, Keith and Chris. The rule was - you get to drink one bottle of french wine for every child you bring to the party. I drank two. Keith drank four. May took a nap before the party, so I stayed later and left at nine with her. Jill left early (eight-ish) with Ben.

I hate talking to people now, because they always ask 'what do you do?' Then, I have to admit that I'm a full time student. Fortunately, Keith told a lot of people my ridiculous life story, and after that, and the requisite wine, I was able to relax and be social.

We brought an onion tart to the party. I got the recipe out of my 'Recipes from Provence' cookbook. It turned out amazingly well. It's a savory tart.

We filled up the kiddie pool and the neighbor girl, Janee, came over and played with the kids. Janee is eight years old, very nice, very polite, and very respectful. May spent a lot of time teasing her today.

Tonight, just as I finished watering the plants and flowers in the yard, it began raining.

I don't know if you've read this in my blog(s) before, but the philadelphia area is very humid. The other day, I was coming home from Jefferson and descended to the train platform. As I came down the stairs, condensation formed on my glasses. Here's another problem. The humid air condenses on the concrete floors of the subway stations, making it a slick, wet, and dangerous surface. I try to never run in the subway or train stations.

Today I was walking my cousin's old suit downtown to get it altered to fit me for my other cousin's (on the other side of my parent's divorce) wedding. As I'm walking down Fern Ave. I see the following peculiar site:

A squirrel sprinting across the road with a small bird in close pursuit. The bird is flying very close to the ground, at the same level as the squirrel, and the bird periodically stabs at the squirrel with its feet. They run across the street with the bird in hot, violent pursuit. Finally, the squirrel runs up a tree on the opposite side of the street. The bird lands on a nearby branch of the same tree and they sit for a moment together before the bird flies back to my side of the street. What gives? Your comments are appreciated.

Even more remarkable is that after relating this bizarre occurrence to my wife, she admits to having seen the very same event on the very same location of the very same street about a week ago. Curiouser and curiouser...

Benjamin is running around the kitchen with his toy broom and dustpan as I write this. His toy mop is a special favorite, but he's not using it right now. Benjamin enjoyed a pretty wild game of 'whale on the mountain' with May and I earlier this morning. Whale On The Mountain is played by picking a kid up off my bed carrying him/her around the room and dropping them on a large pile of pillows and tickling indiscriminately. The dialog closely mimics the children's book of the same name.

The tailor had already left the cleaners for today so I have to return on Tuesday morning. As I was walking back from the cleaners, the pants I brought for alteration slipped out. I noticed and ran all around looking for them. Someone found them on the street and brought them back to the cleaners. I was relieved.

Dear friends, family, and creepy anonymous blog readers, I am posting again to try to update you with what is going on here in Jersey, where only the strong survive.

Jill bought a ton of stuff at the local farmers market, where, oddly, not much of the produce is organic. Having to choose between local and organic, we pick locally grown - a smaller carbon footprint. I'm blogging while cooking. Jill is giving Ben a bath. He's crabby and exhausted from poor napping today. We're having leftover bean soup with some swiss chard sauteed in garlic and oil for dinner tonight. Swiss chard is a rare vegetable that I don't particularly care for but seems to be stalking me up and down the east coast as we ate some swiss chard last week when we were visiting my grandma on Lawn Guylen. I will probably also eat a side of egg salad. For desert, everyone's favorite LEMON PUDDING.

May is watching the end of 'Finding Nemo.' She had a good day today. May is now between zero and one naps each day. I took the kids to the library this afternoon, and on the way home we took a forty-five minute stroll. In order to be sure May didn't fall asleep on the stroll we played a 'who can scream and grunt?' game. Thankfully, both my kids can scream AND grunt.

For those who haven't talked to me since my last post, Benjamin walks. He's not very graceful, and he walks as if he were a robot in lead boots. He clunks around the house, grabs some of his sisters stuff, waits for his sister to protest, then hollers right back at her.

I'm still in the literature search phase of my summer research project. I was able to finish my anatomy review, and am beginning my biochem review. As you can imagine, it's fascinating stuff.

The easter bunny brought my daughter restrictive airway disease in her easter basket this year. She was hospitalized over night from sunday afternoon to monday evening. Monday afternoon, I took Ben to the doctor and he got an anti-biotic for his ear infection. It's been a rough couple of days for the kids.

We finally decided to take May in to the emergency room because she was very listless, had a fever, and was breathing rapidly. It was scary. Jill and May went to the pediatric ER at the Virtua West hospital. I took care of Ben at home.

The height of my anxiety came when Jill lost her cell phone at the hospital. The nurse called me and said, "Are you May's dad?" It was the first thing out of the nurse's mouth and I thought who could be calling me asking a question like that if not a hospital employee after something terrible has happened? Immediately after I had the fright of my life, Jill found her cell phone, so I didn't have to call it after all.

So Monday, I got a ride from the neighbor to the hospital (God bless you Kathy & Dave!). Jill was pretty sore from not nursing Ben, so she got to nurse Ben, and I got to take Ben home, after he nursed. Ben slept for the exact right amount of time to wake up, eat a late lunch, and be chauffeured to his doctor's appointment. After I dropped off his prescription at the drugstore, I went to get my new glasses while they were mixing his medicine. I could tell he was feeling sick because he was willing to run these errands without screaming the whole time through the trip.

More news on Ben: he loves standing up, leaning on a chair, and pushing the chair around the room

Both kids are still sick today, but feeling better.

I look really good in my new, hip, stylish, rectangular framed eyeglasses.

We're studying acid/base homeostasis in school.

First, some anger needs to be vented. (passive voice - would MS Word object?) We drove back from North Carolina yesterday. We left at 2 PM and arrived home at 1 AM. Driving at night is a little less fun, but the kids slept most of the way. Verdict: try to make some of children transporting longer car trips at night.

Anyway, we were coming through DC at about 10 PM last night. I pulled off to take a leak and get some gas. We went to three different gas stations and none would let me use their bathrooms. They said, "sorry, door locked." I said, "please give me the key." They said "no." I said, "I will not buy any gas here. goodbye." They didn't care. Moral of the story: You Cannot Pee in Washington DC.

We were visiting my aunt and uncle, grandparents, and Jill's cousin in North Carolina. The weather was very nice. First we spent a few days in New Bern, NC, and then we went to Kennels Beach to visit Jill's cousin's cottage. Had a great time at both locations. My aunt and uncle live next to a couple who keep bees as a hobby.

I showed May the beehives and she kept wanting to go closer to the beehives. Later that day, we were inside and May wanted to go 'pet the bees.' I was shocked and upset. My aunt, however, had the clever suggestion of calling May's bluff. She said, 'you can go pet the bees but you might get stung.' May said, 'Will I get a band-aid?' Aunt Carolyn said, 'Bee stings just hurt; they don't bleed. If there's no blood, you don't get a band aid.' Then she found a dead wasp and got May to try to pet it. After we learned there was no potential to earn a band-aid and we actually had an opportunity to pet the bee, there was much less general interest in petting the bees.

In Kennels Beach, I especially enjoyed tooling around on the beach with Jill's cousin's husband. We set a net and caught some flounders. I never thought you could fillet a fish as skinny as a flounder, but Brendan proved me wrong. I got to scale the fish, and he filleted them. He has a brilliant talent for this that must come from many years of practice. I'm going to grill them outside tonight on my George Foreman grill.

Ben was happy to be home today. He was too excited to eat. He wanted to play right away. He now likes to get behind a chair and push it around the room. It's great fun. May has been sleeping on the couch all morning. She's feeling a little under the weather.